#useful thought dump

[worldssmallestlizard]

idk if its the innate drive to be "different" or not but i wonder what distinguishes art that is positive in a sincere way from a deceiving way. like its really difficult to write "i just want to make art thats soft and happy and everyones holding hands" without feeling incredibly shallow except like. i guess its just the subtext acknowledging that the world is unstable enough to assume that there would be a need/goal in stability. but pink flowers dont really show the first part. i dont knowwwwww

i had the thought that one day i will be decorating a house with pink things and faux plants and little animal figures and someone will go "aww cute cottagecore aesthetic!" and ill somehow manage to physically recreate the face that every cartoon character makes when tasting a lemon for the first time. and ill know i have either conveyed something very incorrectly or it could just be very easy to misinterpret

i should also make it known i am not willing to go in any different direction with my art unless i move into different things experimentally. i need to convey things that are kind forever. could it be that i refuse to confront the world around me. could it be that i already have. could it be that this is the way i am continuing to.

i still love art that is very raw and cruel even. but i realized people cope in different ways and thats probably not my way most of the time. thats probably it

[charlietheepicwriter7]

H̵̩͋o̸̹͒l̶̢̑ď̸͕ ̵͔͛T̴̲̄h̶͙͋e̶̤͘m̵͍̋ ̷͓̈D̵̯͛o̶̡̅w̵̖̃n̵͝ͅ

Get in the Water AU: Original Post Ruthlessness

Ghosts were physiologically different from humans.

It was something Tucker and Sam didn't understand. They saw Phantom as "Danny with superpowers," not as a fundamentally different being.

Sometimes, Danny didn't understand either.

But his parents did. Utter disregard for the scientific method aside, the Fentons were the ones who learned how inhuman ghosts were: "Just emotions and electricity imprinted on ectoplasm, Danno, nothing to be scared of!" Snapshots of people at the moments of their deaths. The past and the present, incapable of contemplating the future.

And with his duality, Danny struggled to understand either of his halves.

As a human, Danny could move past his nightmare of a childhood, compartmentalize and think to the future, when he was fully healed and his past couldn't hurt him anymore. So when Dora, first elected Queen of the Infinite Realms - long may she reign - asked him to collect all the resurrected humans for a health check and assessment... when he'd noticed Damian Al Ghul-Wanye on the list... He'd thought up a little prank to pull on his long-lost brother. A cruel one, perhaps, but nothing harmful.

As a ghost, Danny couldn't move on. He could never forget that Sam led him to his death, that his parents negligence allowed for the stage to be set, that the lab they loved so much held both his home and his grave. Just as Danny would always be that fourteen year old, caught in that moments, he was still the 7-year-old Danyal Al Ghul who trusted his brother not to hurt him... and ended up poisoned.

Phantom wanted his murderer to suffer.

And Danny, much to his shame, had allowed it.

For a few weeks, Danny managed to ignore it. He'd gone after Damian first, so there were tons of resurrected on his list. He started with the more extreme cases first, like Constantine, but soon enough the next on his list was Ra's Al Ghul.

He'd asked Queen Dora to send someone else, anyone else. That he wouldn't be able to control himself if he saw his grandfather again. Instead of relieving him, she'd given him a knowing look and told him to follow his core's desire.

She never mentions it, but Queen Dora had been a murder victim too.

There was no showmanship, no dramatic reveal. Just Danyal, his grandfather, and the Pit.

Despite all Ra's Al Ghul's power, he was no match for a spirit hellbent on drowning him.

That's what Danny did to his grandfather. He'd thrown up afterwards, once he was human before. But the ghost in him relished the act; he could still feel Grandfather's throat under his hands, pulse fluttering against his palm as Danyal held him down. He struggled and shook as the Lazarus waters filled his lungs, burning away healthy tissue. Fingernails morphed into claws that sliced through the tender skin, blood leaking into the water, and water leaking into the blood.

It took a long time for Grandfather to die. Deep within Danny, next to his core, he knew it was what was deserved. That the murdered finally had justice. He was content with never speaking of it again, a secret between him and the waters.

And now it was going to happen again as Phantom's impulsive mind overtook Fenton's tactical one.

He'd known Damian was looking into him. Knew another confrontation was inevitable, what with two more of his siblings needing their health checks. But as Danny was stalking their mother, searching for the best way to abduct her (she was still his mother after all, he didn't want her dead... yet), Damian and his family confronted her.

Relief washed over him as only a normal amount of rage bubbled up at the sight of Damian, instead of the overwhelming, all-consuming fury he'd felt. Danny laughed at their arguments, at Constantine thinking he could put a living ghost to rest, at his siblings-unmet and his father-unknown, until...

Damian confessed.

His murderer confessed, yet as he continued to speak, to explain, the fury rose in him again. Because it wasn't a betrayal. He'd always thought Damian betrayed him, but no.

Through his own ruthlessness, Damian gave him the only mercy he could manage. And there was only one thing Danyal wanted now.

""̸̲̈́T̶͘͜ä̵̢li̸a̶̬̓ ̴̬̐A̵̛̪l̸̲̚ G̸̛̫h̶̺̏u̸̢̚l!̴̳̈́ D̷̩̕o̸͛ͅ ̶̝̍y̴͙͘o̵̙͐u̵̬̓ ̴̤͂k̸̡̑n̵͓̈́o̷͈͝w̷͖͂ ̷͓͑w̴̧̄h̵̲͌o̴̮̔ ̵̼́Ị̷̂ ̷̣̽a̵̳̓m̷̩̓?̷̝͒"̷̧͠"

It was her fault. She was the reason why he was dead, nothing more than a coward who couldn't go against her father for the sake of her children. She abused them, she struck his brother, it was her fault-

"Danyal," she answered. And Danyal grinned, fanged and sharp.

He approached, the waters of his birthplace lovingly brushing against his legs, consoling him the only way they knew how. They whispered revenge into his ears, madness into his heart, just as they had when he'd confronted Damian, when he murdered Grandfather. "You have much to answer for, daughter of the Demon Head," he said, voice echoing around the room.

Unrestrained greed filled her gaze. "You've returned to me, my son."

Danyal laughed, brutal and rough. "I've returned for you, Mother," he corrected. "Don't think this reunion will end well for you."

"You mean to hurt me, Danyal?" she crooned, all false hurt and fake love.

"I mean to kill you."

Genuine anger flashed across her face. "My son would never-"

"Y̵̺̆o̴̩͂u̸͉̕r̷̰͝ ̴͔͝s̵̡̉o̶̡̎ň̵̞ ̶̗̈i̴̘̍s ̸̦̐d̴̯̚ê̶͚á̶̩d̷̻̈́," he snarled, and Damian flinched. He was too close to Talia. "You wanted me dead... for being weak. For having mercy." He stared up at his mother's shocked form. "I killed Grandfather. Tell me, is that ruthless enough for you, Umi?" Talia flinched with just her eyes. He hadn't been allowed to call her Umi since he was three.

Their father stepped forward, the naked distress on his face contrasting with his battle armor. "Danyal," he plead. "You don't have to do this-"

"Stay out of this, Baba." The man's breathing hitched. "This doesn't involve you."

Constantine tried to talk him down next. "It does, kid. A Siren on your level can't stay around for long. It's time for you to rest."

Danyal threw back his head and laughed. "As if you could stop me, exorcist." No more delays. It's time for action. "I will drown you all before you can."

Danyal lunged. And despite his mother's decades as an assassin, she couldn't kill what was already dead.

He held her down by the throat, the attacks from Damian's family bouncing off him. "This is mercy," he cooed as she desperately clawed at his hands. "For me. For Damian. For everyone you will try to hurt in the future. Ruthlessness is the only mercy I can give you now." Her face turned red as she gaped for air and Danyal-

Was thrown back into the water.

Reorienting himself, he found John Constantine standing over his mother, protecting her from him. "̷̪͂E̷̺͐x̷̝̑ŏ̶̺ȑ̴͉c̷̟͘i̸͔̋s̶̮̀t̶̯͝."

And the Pit's water began to rise.

[yourlocalabomination]

The skin of maids

[lorebird]

In which Ford struggles so badly to relate to other people that he wonders if he’s really human at all. The more isolated he becomes, the harder it is to reconcile with his own humanity.

[leaving-grapefruitss]

what i think the obey me boys smell like

lucifer: expensive cologne, wine and sleep deprivation

mammon: axe body spray and 4-in-1 (shampoo, body wash, toothpaste and motor oil)

levi: water

satan: old books, old spice

asmo: a bath and body works

beel: a drive thru

belphie: lavender pillow spray, essential oils

diavolo: aftershave, sandalwood

barbatos: chamomile tea, hand sanitiser and ginger

simeon: dove bar soap, that dark blue nivea body cream and fabric softener

solomon: dust

luke: baby powder, johnson’s body wash and granulated sugar

why have i spent time to think of this

[camthecatchameleon]

ah i can finally post these

also all of these were drawn before i caught up to the most recent episode (49) so if anything i've drawn is overly close to existing art i'm sorry but i straight up would not have known smiley face uhhhhhh anyways

^ i dont know that the fuck was wrong with my but i did this with a 1px lineart.

source: this post

below: a bunch of doodles in my (digital) latin textbook

also: a bunch of notebook doodles during japanese school yes i have a problem

[sorry-not-feeling-it-right-now]

The Narrator from Slay the Princess is an extremely tragic character and people don’t talk enough about him

Imagine you are a man, who loved the world and is afraid of death so, SO much, chose to sacrifice your own life to create a construct for two gods in order to prevent the fate your world is facing, by creating a “body” for TLQ and writing a rough script of how the overall story is gonna go

And then you created echoes of yourself after your death, hoping that you can guide your creation to do their job

And as the story goes, not only does your creation not trust you, and most of his voices does not like you at all, but also because you are an echo that you couldn’t remember what had happened that you unknowingly had trapped a version of yourself inside of an unending loop

And also, since you are an echo that was created to ensure the creation did their job, you simply CANNOT fail, or else everything you had done is just pointless. You had died for nothing.

And the real you will never be able to learn that. The real you had died hoping that his echo will succeed in its job, and never learning that change is not something that we should be afraid of.

[lmanburs]

I think what makes TLOU show both enjoyable for the new and old fans is that they've kept the main story beats the same but the ways we actually get to these points are extremely different and take full advantage of the transition between mediums. We get a lot more time with the actual characters rather than on exploration and I'm really digging the pre-outbreak exposition we're getting before every episode

[freaky-flawless]

I know its canon that Twyla and Spectra are friends...

But in my heart, Twyla hates her guts.

[transk0vsky]

This game is like the sand pest and I’ve been infected

[sergle]

There's something about like. A certain genre of posts / Online Opinions about insecurity/depression/misery/complaints that are so unhelpful that they wrap right around to being straight up hilarious. and it's the ones that are more or less written to the tone of "Feeling bad? That's gross!" Like, just so you know, don't voice your insecurities/ have low self esteem, because that's offputting! You're gross and weird. Don't be insecure about that, though. That would be stupid if you felt insecure about people disliking you for being insecure. Not attractive. You should be thinking about being as attractive as possible. You shouldn't make comments about suicide, even if you're suicidal! Keep those thoughts entirely to yourself. Make sure nobody around you knows you're thinking about this. It would Make Them Uncomfortable. It's better to keep these thoughts in your head where they can fester. Don't post OR talk to friends with complaints about you feeling miserable or depressed. Tbh people who are sad/upset a lot? Kinda a red flag! You are probably miserable because you're a bad person and you've brought this on yourself. If you don't have friends, it's because you're awful to be around. Easy! Solved the problem for you. And no, there is no nuance to this, got it? So, make sure to feel bad about feeling bad, but don't feel bad about it, because, well, that's just gross. And annoying! You might've wanted your brain rotted thoughts to be Peer Reviewed, you might have just needed to vent- you might've been hoping for some comfort, to get things off your chest. Well, don't! Don't talk about thoughts or feelings that are negative with your friends, you'd be burdening them and that's only meant for THERAPY. #SponsoredbyBetterHelp #MentalHealth like, DAMN. that's so helpful. you're so good at helping. I um really liked the part where these are all hard and fast rules that encourage keeping feelings bottled up and keeping your friends at arm's length. That's really funny of you.

[governmentmandatedryujinstan420]

releasing this from the hj discord dungeon because the public populace was in agreement also i'm chronically offline on tumblr and need to fix that for my chronically online ahh

[magicicephoenix]

Have you seen the meme where someone gets given a stress ball and the instructions "if you ever feel stressed, squeeze this." or "if you ever feel the need to cause chaos, squeeze this." And they do, but they don't stop, so it just pops in their hand. The Sun, dca who Sun, would have this interaction with their (hypothetical) minion. Correct me if I'm wrong.

oh yea. definitely

[inthesovietsnow]

[even-disco-baby]

ESPIRIT DE CORPS  — The lieutenant is aware that you adore him. Painfully so. You aren’t exactly subtle about it.

Oh god. I’m not? Oh fuck.

Good! I wasn’t trying to be *subtle* about it.

Hey. No need to get personal.

ESPIRIT DE CORPS — Sorry, boss. His thoughts, not mine.

In any case, he is aware. Your adoration is plain for all to see, even for such an island of a man as the lieutenant is. Or once was, perhaps. And his own feelings toward you are… difficult to describe, but they are there. 

EMPATHY — Strong feelings. 

ESPIRIT DE CORPS — He doesn’t know if they can be called love, but it is a thought that has occurred to him. In a broad sense, they surely are love of *some* kind, at the very least. You are his friend. He cares for you. And…

HALF LIGHT — And he is afraid of you.

EMPATHY — And he is afraid *for* you.

ESPIRIT DE CORPS — And he is afraid for himself.

YOU — Afraid? Why?

INLAND EMPIRE — You know why. Do not fool yourself. You, with the scaffold of you all awry. There is no part of you that offers him sure footing.

ENDURANCE — Even your body… One way or another, he knows that he’ll probably be the one to find you dead, and it could come any day.

I hope it’s soon.

I wouldn’t want it to be anyone else.

No! I don’t want to do that to him…

Wait a second! Who said anything about dying?! I’m turning over a new leaf! I want to live!

PAIN THRESHOLD — Oh, Harry… You still don’t understand, do you? You’re already dying. You’re a miracle, really. You know you nearly had a fatal heart attack just from stubbing your toe in the dark this morning? It’s no longer a matter of if, but when.

ELECTROCHEMISTRY — Hey, you’ve always known that you were gonna be here for a good time, not a long time! The lieutenant ought to take a page out of your book, instead of being such a miserable, lonely old man.

RHETORIC — No offense, but I don’t think that the partying has made you any less miserable, lonely, or old. 

KIM KITSURAGI — Your partner takes another long drag of his cigarette, letting the smoke fill his lungs. He holds it there for a moment, then slowly breathes it out into the night.

ESPIRIT DE CORPS — He accepted a long time ago that this ritual may very well be the death of him, too. It’s a risk that he has made far more calculated by his rigid discipline. He would find it difficult to live without these small indulgences, but nearly impossible if he granted them too much power over himself.

And so it is with *you.* He can indulge himself with questions, imaginings. What it would be like to lower his spines and be a softer kind of animal. But he cannot give these feelings any more power over him than this, or it will be the death of him.

YOU — …Am I really so bad that I would kill him?

ESPIRIT DE CORPS — No. Worse than that, you would *change* him. You or anyone. To entertain the notion of true love as anything more than a pleasant, unattainable dream would be the death of the man that he has built himself into over the decades. He would become something so much smaller and more vulnerable. An animal with a soft belly exposed to the world.

YOU — Is that really anything to be afraid of?

HALF LIGHT — It is the only thing that there is to be afraid of.

INLAND EMPIRE — He is right to be afraid. The world is nothing but a series of patterns, so easily disrupted and changed and lost forever. There is no sense in any of it, no grand reason that makes any of it worth the terror and the pain. The world will swallow you both and then be swallowed whole. Après le monde, le gris. Après le gris… rien. There is nothing that either of you could offer the other to change this. In the face of it, your small bodies and your fleeting thoughts become so unbearably absurd. 

VOLITION — No. It is bearable. 

YOU — It is?

VOLITION — It is the only thing that there is to bear.

[silvermeww]

okay, when was someone going to tell me that

oh, idk, steven started at 19, burgh has a younger sister, clay actually isn't born american, skyla's whole fam thing and ELESA IS 15???? (even younger than skyla like wtf???)

(also the 'alder' at the bottom is supposed to be drayden lol)

and that's not all

say hello to:

viola being 18??? 'black whirlwind' korrina, RAMOS MEETING AZ'S FLOETTE AS A KID, genderfluid and apparently also age-fluid olympia, CLEMONT?? AND HIS WHOLE THING DOWN TO BEING 12 OF ALL AGES???

(you know what, marlon being 30 definitely makes sense with the hippie vibes)

wikstrom SAYING that he only wears that suit in pokemon battles but i've never seen his casual wear, malva being pr for flare lol, drasna selling dragon merch + great family lore if you want to know, siebold having to third-wheel lysandre and sycamore while eating (move aside malva, you're not the only elite 4 dealing with this) and 20?? YEARS OLD?? DIANTHA????????????

(way too many men in kalos are getting ladies, c'mon)

ethan being into history is such a neat detail hmmm, idk much of the frontier brains ngl, and we've finally got the region for looker and it's... hoenn??? you know what, makes sense with his chaotic vibes so i'll take it (throws away unova taped to a rock behind my back). also he's abolsutely cheating we all see that he's just relying on knowing us as protags, should've known smh

(um i think someone said that 'caitlin' should've been anabel but idk)

oh and the last one is charon, if we care about how much of a loser he really is. forget about birch and the poochyena, this guy is the lowest heh. imagine being charon (please don't).

(when the protags of johto are the same age as clemont lol) (yeah i know there are years between those events just let me have this)

and last but not least:

aaron 🤝 valerie: wanting to be pokemon (and ig gotta toss in shauntal with the ao3 writer gift heh, don't know if they would commission her or stay away), bertha's description???? i love flint just saying, cynthia 👀👀 is absolutely doing something illegal 👀👀, roark is WHAT??? (child labour laws in sinnoh must be lax ngl), maylene as well???? fantina watching scary movies is something i'll have to incorporate into my worldview and bryon?? are you okay??

so yeah. credit goes to @/KuroBlitz96 on the twitter/x for having this up, i'm just here to project sheer surprise at this massive dump of ages... my thoughts on pokemon have completely turned on its head once more lol (this is fine)